Metro Times Blowout – Day 2 (or is it Day 1? Well, I guess it depends on whether you consider the opening party day one, but it is an “opening party,” not a day, but it certainly feels like it was a day, well, a night, but last night was a night too, not a day, okay then “Thursday”).

Ever realize how many bars in Hamtramck proudly display myriad trophies won over the years by their bar/club-sponsored bowling, softball, and youth basketball teams? Ever notice that most of these trophies hark back to the 70s, 80s, and early 90s? It’s kind of weird. Are these simply relics of the past–a reminder of the communities that used to be so strong here and are struggling to remain in this age of internets and “www”s? Are they just silly bar bling? Is their dusty gaudiness a sign of what we youngsters are doing to our roots? Ironic trinkets? And what do they have to do with the Blowout? I think we should borrow them from the bar owners. I think the Blowout’s reward for bringing three days of solid business–probably the most they receive all year–should be one trophy every year, to be given to the act that actually plays their time slot and doesn’t go on 20 minutes late.

JK. But seriously folks, if nothing else, these trophies reveal how unique the Blowout really is. The youth and their music invade the old holes-in-the-wall of retired auto workers, laborers, and Pollacks (I am one, so I get to say that with immunity, although I am a Wyandotte Pollack, which is, I’ve been told, a different genus but still the same species) and everybody gets along just fine. It makes me want to give back, perhaps dig up old bowling trophies from my Polish Roman Catholic Union (PRCU) Youth Bowling League days and donate them to Hamtramck bars. The Belmont and Small’s don’t have any. What’s up with that Belmont?!?!?! Hey, I think we should all go back to our folks’ houses, dig up our old bowling, track and field, baseball, and Quiz Bowl trophies (I know some of you out there have Quiz Bowl trophies) and leave them on the bar of the Belmont just after last call on Saturday night. That’s a way to end a Blowout! 2:00 am. Lift a shot glass from the bar. Down it. Plant a youth-league bowling trophy on the bar. Leave. You in?

Thursday night, and Whalebomb and I made some rounds. I had my camera. He had his coy wit and stolid, unblinking stare. We had fun. Here’s the report:

The Darts (Baker’s Streetcar)

Whalebomb:The Darts were amazing. Fresh, young band. The lead singer should be in every band. The amount of energy he released playing to a handful of people was crazy. He was so in to it and looked natural doing so, like if you ever caught him practicing, he’d be shaking and spasing about, and you’d be waiting for some type of accident. I was impressed to say the least.

Millions of Brazilians (The Belmont)

Whalebomb: Then we caught the end of Millions of Brazilians, which you saw, so go ahead with that one. All I have to say about it it is…dancey pop-rock…I’m in.

Scotter: Started the night here after just finishing the post from Wednesday night. I have a hard time writing about bands I know personally. I used to play with two of these guys in a band years ago and am a little jealous that they’re so good now (we were not great, but passable because our fans were always a bit more wasted than we were). Nick is the lead singer and he pretty much sweats emotion and virility while playing and singing and looks exhausted after every song, only to recover in the 30 seconds between songs to give the next one just as much gusto and passion. I’ve seen them 3-4 times and they get better and better every time. They played with a lot of verve and I think that they’re going to take Detroit on a drive and plant a long, sexy kiss on Detroit’s lips and possibly stay the night and even take Detroit out to breakfast the morning after–that’s just the kind of good guys these boys are.

^{Millions of Brazilians}

Ethos (Atlas), then Speedy Greasy (New Dodge)

Whalebomb: Waited too long for Ethos to start so we missed them. We headed to the New Dodge to check out Speedy Greasy. They were good, solid rock ‘n roll. Everyone in the band seemed to be very talented and played well together. They covered the Black Keys, which was interesting.

Lightning Love (Kelly’s)

Scotter: I like to walk. Screw the car. Screw the shuttle. I almost slipped twice. But it was worth it . Figured if I’m going to do this Blowout right, I might as well rough it out. And I was sure glad I trekked from The Belmont to Kelly’s for Lightning Love. I’m going to resist using words like “adorable” or “cute” to describe this threesome, led by singer/songwriter, Leah. Yeah, they’re young–they probably go to either U-M or EMU–but Leah’s somewhat jaded, witty, and scrupulously observant lyrics make her the most mature social critic of the campus on campus. Her themes are love and companionship, hanging out, getting drunk, getting laid, and the truths and consequences that result. Lyrically, Leah reminds me of a young Khaela Maricich of the Blow and musically the group is about as pleasing to listen to as can be. I’ve never heard anyone sing the words “So awkward” so awkwardly. They were great and I’m looking forward to hearing more songs and an album.

^{Lightning Love}

Champions of Breakfast (Baker’s Streetcar)

Whalebomb: Back to Baker’s Streetcar for Champions of Breakfast. You were closer to them than me, so you tackle that one. I just wish they played every night of Blowout.

Scotter: Okay. Here’s my take:

OMFG!

More?

Well, COB is two guys who have pre-recorded all of their music and dance and sing to them with so much energy that I swear they plug in at night and get their energy directly from the Fermi II power plant. People I’ve known for years who never dance at a concert were dancing by the middle of the set. The debuted a song called “When Trolls Roam the Earth” about when trolls roam the earth. Guess what? When trolls roam the earth, they’re gonna start a band.

My favorite lyric of the night: “I’m gonna commit a sex act…with my heart.”

^{The Champions of Breakfast}

Whalebomb: There was a brief moment of FAIL during the Champions of Breakfast set in the middle of their first song. Apparently “all of their equipment” seemed to go mute at the exact same time. Wierd. It was followed by a brief moment of silence and disappointment, until someone yelled “REMIX!” in response to maybe COB having a new version of their song. Then someone yelled “I’ll play with you,” referencing the song lyrics, followed by “Someone jump to restart the iPod.” Someone jumped. COB was not happy and reluctantly skipped to the next song. I felt like I was at a Johnny Headband show from long ago for a moment. It was wonderful.

Scotter: This picture above is the moment of “Error 404.” The boys just kind of stood in freeze frame, waiting for the song to start up, and I think that their “equipment” skipped to the next song all on its own. I think COB should start telling people that the mastermind behind their music is “the equipment,” who tells them how to dress, writes their songs, and teaches them their dance moves. Kind of like The Hives myth of the mysterious Randy Fitzsimmons, only instead of a clandestine and mysterious Svengali, COB is controlled by a HAL, named “the Equipment.” And why haven’t they used “The Equipment” as a penis euphemism in one of their songs yet? Or have they?

SikSik Nation (Kelly’s Bar)

Whalebomb: We went to Kelly’s after for SikSik Nation. They were better than I had remembered from last year. I got to play a maraca for them during one of their songs. I was pumped. There were a lot of Polish men who had probably been sitting at that place years before Blowout started. And they seemed to like SikSik Nation as well. The band was full of energy, especially the bassist who was very successful getting most of the crowd clapping, and playing maracas and tambourines while they rocked.

Scotter: After COB, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I know I stuck around Baker’s for awhile, and vaguely remember singing Huey Lewis’s “The Power of Love” along with the juke box and teasing my friend Michelle for not dancing with a song I wrote on the spot called “My name is Michelle and I won’t dance.”

Listless, buzzed, and with my mind blown by COB, I wandered down to the P.L.A.V. for the only act that could have followed Champions of Breakfast and made my night even better.

Devin Scillian (P.L.A.V)

^{Devin Scillian – Detroit News Personality and Guitar-Picker}

^{Scillian’s cowboy boots. Yes!}
This was great. He was really passionate and was playing with a lot of emotion, but I couldn’t help thinking how weird it was to be here. There were a lot of 40-year-old news groupies around cheering him on, and when I yelled, drunkedly, “Devin’s got the Skillians to pay the Billions!” I got shhhh’d.

I love it. Next year, I want an entire showcase of Detroit news personalities. I want Carmen Harlan up there singing Sade. I want Andrew Humphrey on the triangle. I want Guy Gordon beatboxing. It shall be glorious! In breaking news, Mort Crim fucks your world with a 20-minute tap solo! This just in: Chuck Gaidica plays a wicked drum solo, ending the set by biting off the head of chicken!

This was at the PLAV. Someone buy it for me. Please. Please. Look at the little dancing babys. Look at the Staisu Clause at the center! Hey bands, buy this for me and I will write the greatest review for your new album imaginable. I’ll use every adjective in the dictionary. I’ll do it for you, if you do this for me.

^{Couldn’t leave the PLAV without doing the Cupid Shuffle.}

The Rest of the Night

Whalebomb:Went to Capo for the Hip-Hop show. Stayed for 2-3 songs as the sound was pretty bad. The guys vocals were distorted. Had they sounded good, it would have been very entertaining cause he was really getting into it.

Scotter Headed back to the Belmont for last call. On the way I took this picture in front of JPII with Oscillating Fan Club, and et.al.:

After that, we went to a greasy spoon called Campau Towers with some friends and had just enough money for some grilled cheese samiches and fries. Someone starting tapping on the counter at a regular beat and we broke out into Biz Markie’s “Just a Friend.” Everybody in the place (all 11 of us) starting singing along. It was marvelous.

Reflections and Predictions for Friday

Whalebomb: Lots of people are angry cause everything was running late and spilling over and the time system sucks…thats about the only thing i kept overhearing…and talking about.

Scotter: I hope I can do this two more nights without dying.

Whalebomb: A lot of bars having menus for fish fry on Friday. Blowouteers should be heading there early to eat dinner tonight.

Scotter: I’m going to die tomorrow…for rock n’ roll!